Friday, October 30, 2009

How Things Change

Before I had kids, dating was easy. I was free whenever I wanted to go out, and I could date guys who were of slightly iffy character, because I didn't have to worry about anyone but me. And I (stupidly in retrospect) thought that I could take care of myself just fine and had nothing to worry about.

My ex-husband changed all of that. Not just because he gave me the two kids that I now have to worry about, but because he was such a major *insert REALLY dirty word here* that my standards have gotten drastically higher.

While they are higher, I don't think my standards are really that much to ask. I want a man that is mentally stable (by mentally stable I mean don't tell me aliens are your best friend or that you're in love with me 5 seconds after we met). I want someone who actually wants to be with me, and is willing to give up other women to do so. Someone who can make me laugh, and who, although he might have the power to break my heart, won't actually do it just because he can. And is it really so much to ask that he be honest? And I don't just mean on the big things. If you're 28, tell me that. Don't lie and say you're 39. I mean, really. I can tell just by looking at you that you're not. And oh, if you're married, pass me by. I know what it's like to be the wife sitting at home thinking my husband is out with his "buddy" while in reality he's banging the bartender at his favorite bar. Now, I'm not a bartender, but I refuse to play her role in your version.

My friends keep telling me that I can find guys who meet these standards. I hope they're right. E is certainly nice enough, so they're probably right. But E and I are only going to be friends, I think. I did just start talking to someone else, and so far, he seems really nice. We've only had a couple of conversations so far, though, so we'll see.

And on another note, if you want a really good laugh, find a 6 yr old boy and teach him to sing "Superfreak". J heard this on the Visa commercial the other day, and for the last week has run around the house singing, "She's a superfreak, superfreak, she's superfreaky". It might not be entirely appropriate, but it is completely hilarious.

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